When my son Alex was growing up, like many children, he occasionally mispronounced certain words. Sometimes we corrected them right away; other times they stuck around longer. One of those words was restaurant, which he pronounced restaur-not.
Since we are a food allergy family, the term continued to have meaning for us, long after Alex self-corrected his pronunciation.
It still does to this day. We have found that distinguishing a restaurant from a restaur-not is an important step in food allergy dining safety. As well, it’s a fun way to appreciate a great safe dining experience or to rise above the disappointment of an unpleasant one.
When we find an eating establishment where my son’s multiple allergies can be accommodated and he can enjoy his meal, that’s a restaurant. Excellent!
When we enter a place that has unsafe foods or inexperienced staff, that’s a restaur-not. Keep moving, it’s not safe to eat there.
Here are a couple of instances where we came face-to-face with an extreme restaur-not.
Food Allergy Dining: Floor As Decor
It all started when we were on a road trip through New Mexico. During my trip planning, I looked up a potential restaurant that seemed to focus on grilled food, such as burgers and chicken. On the website, it looked perfect. I read the menu carefully and felt it would be a great location to safely eat, rest and refuel.
When we walked inside, everything seemed to be in order. A friendly hostess greeted us and was eager to seat us in a spacious booth. As we walked, I noticed debris on the ground around my feet, and that I was kicking up a little dust cloud. We paused before sitting as my husband and I realized we were looking at crushed peanut shells all over the floor! You guessed it – a restaur-not.
I told Alex to run outside as quickly as possible, which he did. Then I explained to the hostess we couldn’t stay because of a severe peanut allergy. She was understanding and apologetic, offering to wipe down the table. However, we were already out the door before I could say: “no thank you!”
The wild part of this memory is that we sent our elementary-aged son outside alone without knowing what was out there. Instinctively, we felt it would be safer for him than where we were!
This is where a fun term can help keep things in perspective. In the moment this was happening, it was scary. But in hindsight, it has become an amusing family memory. (Remember how we hightailed it out of that diner in New Mexico?)
Sure, it was disappointing to have plans fall through. But pronouncing the place a restaur-not helped us get through the situation without negative emotion. The bottom line: we had to move on to somewhere else safe.
Facing A Wall of Peanuts
Another memorable moment happened more recently, when my son was moving into his college dorm. We were driving around the area to find local restaurants where he could eat if he wanted a break from the allergy-friendly options at the school cafeteria.
We noticed a burger place within walking distance of the university that we’d heard great things about. After checking their website on my phone, they seemed to only serve burgers and hot dogs. Promising!
We walked through the door with high hopes, but didn’t make it far. As soon as we stepped inside, we were greeted with a wall of open cardboard cases filled to the top with peanuts. There was a stack of small paper trays so customers could scoop out their own portion of peanuts to eat as they waited for their orders. It was like cross-contact was on the menu.
It took five seconds to realize that this was a restaur-not. While it was a fun, upbeat environment and perfect for hungry college students without allergies – it was definitely unsafe for us. We turned and left immediately, able to chuckle at how high that establishment scored on our restaur-not scale.
Tips to Skip the Restaur-not
After years of looking up restaurants, reading menus, and making decisions on where to try to eat, our family has a few guidelines to help avoid restaur-nots.
- When food allergy dining, don’t just rely on the website. Call ahead to find out if they use peanut or nut oils, hand out free peanuts or allow peanut shells on the floor. Is there cheese cross-contact with burgers?
- Remember that even if you call, people make mistakes. They might accidentally give misinformation about their foods or establishment. Walk into each location with a discerning eye, ready to notice unsafe items.
- Don’t be afraid to acknowledge you have entered a restaur-not. Do not hesitate to leave immediately.
- When you do experience a restaur-not, give yourself a break. You tried to research, and it doesn’t always work out. Remember that it’s helpful to know the places that are safe, as well as those you’ll want to avoid.
Avoid Restaur-not Disappointment
Finding safe, trustworthy restaurants is uplifting for food allergies families. It’s a great feeling to know you found another option for dining out. On the other hand, it can be a defeating feeling to try a new restaurant you expected to be safe, just to discover it was the opposite.
Every food allergy family has lived this experience at one time or another. It’s important to move on to a safer choice, but it doesn’t have to remain a negative memory for your family to carry around. Once any danger has passed, just call it what it was .… You found a restaur-not!
Roll your eyes in disbelief, shake your head and move on in your food allergy journey, a little wiser and more discerning than you were before that experience.
Caroline Fleur is the author of Destiny and Other Dilemmas, a novel with twists, turns, romance and a dash of food allergy perspective. The former bilingual and special education teacher has a son with multiple food allergies and EoE, and she is dedicated to raising food allergy awareness.
Related Reading:
The Surprising Side Effect of Food Allergies: Confidence
Step-by-Step Guide to Dining Out with Food Allergies
My Top Food Allergy Pet Peeves: It Doesn’t Have to Be This Hard
